I think you got this whole thing wrong. I would love to hear that a woman I was dating interned at NOW. I would assume that she is more liberal in her politics and open to her own needs -- which in "man-speak" means she's more likely to put out.

Well, here we go.
1) Oh God. at least you get to say you only have TWO cats! Some freaks on this planet have four, the sum total of their DIVORCE settlement. Hi! Crazy much?
2) You are adorable, and in no way could you ever be militantly otherwise, because (thank god) you love Francesco Biasia as much as I do.
3) I adore your mom and need a path to enlightenment.
4) hi! We are both awake and not onthe phone... why???

OK, I've been lurking here reading your blog for a few days, and I love it! And guess what?? I was just today having the same debate with myself, because I love the song "Shake That" by Eminem, with the oh so feminist lyrics "I need a slut, will you be mine" and "Open your mouth for about 4 or 5 minutes". I can't explain it.

There is no contradiction in loving yourself and your sisters, and loving a peppy li'l beat. The key is not to admit to liking these things to the kind of asshole jerks that interpret it as some kind of approval of the message (when it is merely an approval of getting down). Jen, I sympathise with your early admission. I, too, would have played it cool for a few more weeks (ditto with admitting to liking "that kind" of music.) However, if he's cool, and I think (hope!) he is, he'll learn just how complex you are and love you for it.

No comment on any events that may or may not have transpired at the Market house. :)

as a secret lover of some 2 Live Crew, (and unabashed Eminem groupie), i say sometimes it's all about the beat and the bump and the lyrics and the hump... :)

Eh. I figure if a guy hears these kind of admissions and decides to stay around, then he is OK. I understand your confusion about feminism. I was raised by a mother who told me that it is important that I be able to support myself. She also told me that men should open doors. I'm still trying to figure it out.

As far as music goes, I must admit that "Salt Shaker" is a rather catchy tune. And don't even get me going on 2 Live Crew. Face it, Jen. You are not alone.

great post! i went to an all women's college and struggle with the feminist/non-feminist stuff all the time.

Dagny, your mama MUST be Southern!! Because that's the same sort of advice I got, except it was, "Never call boys, they should be calling you." combined with "If you want something in life, it's up to you to work hard for it."

Ya'll.

Laurie, my mama is quite unabashedly Southern and quite proud of it. I too got the "Never call boys" speech. The only time it was acceptable to call a boy was when I needed to get a homework assignment and only if there were no girls to call. I also got "A lady never sits at the bar." It still deeply disturbs my mother when I go to work wearing a skirt without hose.

2 things:
1- I too usually end up revealing odd things about myself on first dates. Things just come out. It's not like I plan what to say or not, but you always know what you shouldn't be saying. And as those things spill out of your lips, you say to yourself, 'oh man....'
2- Feminism does seem to be taking a turn. You can be a feminist while being feminine [read: girly, preppy, whatever] Feminists of yesteryear may not approve, but I think the new-wave of feminists all completely agree with your point of view.

"Often generalise about men as assholes in an extended adolescence."

Quote of the day.

I'm not going to argue, but I love being a big, grotty baby.

I don't believe in chauvenism, feminism or speeling... I think we all just need to have faith in ourselves and treat others as we'd like to be treated ourselves. Do that and we'll all just be fine.

Sadly, that is just naive in our modern society, so we require organisations and movements and whatever-the-f-we-can to get the message of equality and fairness out there to the masses.
So, good on you for doing your internship at NOW and supporting their message.

I have not made any such sort of positive action, well other than sponsor a child (but that's a different topic)... Although, once upon a time I worked crowd-control and I used to pay a little extra special attention to those guys who were "ungentlemanly" (read: rough) with their ladies in the venue. Actually, a slight digression, but my god did that job open up my eyes to human behaviour. We suck. A lot.